Le Weekend

...it was busy busy busy.

I was honored to be asked to perform for Molly Keogh, an artist who makes dresses in conjuction with Andrea Zittel's Smockshop. The performance was called "On Her Dress She Wears a Body" - five girls interpreting five different dresses through movement as shapes five separate times, making a star configuration. We performed at the Regen Projects booth at ArtLA.

I was asked by a friend, and I jumped right in even though I've not performed in front of an audience since May 2001, and even though I've not stretched or excercised since October 2007. I did it because I wanted to make sure that my balls were as big as I thought they were, or at least as big as my mother's. It has been confirmed. I do indeed have quite large balls. Now I'm performing a piece for an artist on Saturday at Machine Project in Echo Park. Now we'll see if I have what it takes to handle these balls. Okay, you know what, scratch that. I really wasn't trying to innuendo at all, just trying to be clever, and of course, it backfires...

So there was the fair. I didn't make it to LA Art - no money. If I weren't involved in anything at ArtLA I wouldn't have made it there, either. I really enjoyed myself, even though it was a little cramped. There were people and galleries from all over. I really like how a lot of the galleries made use of the limited space that they had. It was like installing the different galleries became an installation show in and of itself. Of course, there was bad art represented. But there was also a lot of good stuff, and I ran into a lot of old USC classmates. We're all over. During a stroll I was taking, I overheard this guy speaking loudly into his cell, "...yeah, I'm at the fair. Looking at at what's here makes me feel much better about my art." Stupid stuck-up attitudinal (another word creation) tactless BOY. It's true, about one-third of the art there made me feel better about my art, but you don't see me yelling it into my cell phone at a crowded art fair, making sure that somebody notices how cocky I am. Stupid boy.

After the performance Saturday, I went home and rested - I swear I think I pulled a back muscle. And then I had to get myself all spruced up and thangs for the solemn business of knocking back wine and hors d'oeuvres and looking important at gallery openings in hopes that the PR people will want to buy ad space in the magazine. I visited Corey Helford, Blum & Poe, LA X Art, Sandroni Rey, the Mandrake bar, Angstrom, and Honor Fraser with the 'SC homegirls Kate and Peg. We're gonna start a gang.

After that, I met up with my good friend Mike/Miguel and his cousin Ishmael, and we headed over to my friend's tattoo/piercing party. I'm very fortunate to have made good male friends here in LA, and even though I'm usually one of maybe 4 or 5 girls at his parties, I never feel uncomfortable at JB's parties. And as usual, I was the only one who wouldn't hit the blunt...

Sunday was also a great day - after bible class, I went to the information meeting where I found out more about the performance piece I'll be participating in Saturday. Then, I had to man the Artillery booth for a couple hours at ArtLA again - met a lot of cool people. My homegirl Brooke is obsessed with my aunt's recipe for corn pudding, so I went over her apartment and made her some as we watched The Wire. And by the way, what a great show! I usually feel intellectually superior because of my lack of ownership of a television set, but there are a few really great shows that I'm missing out on.

Like The L Word. I looooooooooooovvve The L Word, it's sooooooooooo good! Now I know what lesbian sex is! But seriously folks, despite the fact that they paint the lesbian world as endlessly glamourous consisting only of amazingly gorgeous women, the writers delve into really deep issues and go all the way, never flinching. And how about last night??! Don't want to spoil anything, but I'm keeping hope alive for Bette and Tina. I usually watch the show with a friend of mine who's still at USC and her group of friends she refers to loosely as "The Lesbians". My homegirl is a woman-eater. As in opposite of man-eater, you prurient gutter-minds. Anyway, we had a good time yelling advice to the TV screen and cheering and booing.


Kucinich Drops His Presidential Bid

For more coverage of Dennis Kucinich, go to the Openers blog.

Well, it's not like he was going to win, anyway. I just wish that he would have waited until after the California primary. I was looking forward to requesting a Democratic primary ballot, as is my right as a registered non-partisan voter according to Democratic Party rules. And with a flourish, I was going to press the little ink dot next to Kucinich's name in defiance of everyone who tries to convince me that there's no point in doing so.

Sigh. Unless Nader enters the race or the Green Party mounts a coherent and viable presedential contender, I won't be voting in the general elections. I'm sure the world will mourn...


Regarding Abortion...

Posting on the fly again. I stumbled upon this video on YouTube via Crooks and Liars, where a man asked different "pro-life" protesters at a rally what should happen to women who have abortions illegally. I'm not at all surprised by their answers...



Amy Goodman and Juan Gonzalez of Democracy Now interview David Cay Johnston who recently wrote “Free Lunch: How the Wealthiest Americans Enrich Themselves at Government Expense (And Stick You with the Bill)”.

Notice how Barack Obama tries to praise Ronald Reagan (for some ungodly reason) using vague generalities. Wonder why he can't cite specific examples? Because there are none!


Art Nerdism

Yes, I'm an absolute dork when it comes to art - I love viewing the manifestations of what's inside people, and I love taking part in that process also. Growing up, I wasn't the most talkative person and I still have trouble verbally expressing myself. For me, art is the way that I talk. This past Wednesday evening, my magazine boss Tulsa took me to an event at the Getty Museum: a panel discussion between avant-garde black artists from the 60s and 70s who collaborated often in producing work.

I'm so glad she invited me, it was so informative because when it comes to the art history that is taught in universities, the only black artists you'll ever hear of are probably Betye Saar, Lorna Simpson, and maybe Kara Walker (whom I love and want to stalk). For instance, when it comes to video being used as an art form, because of the way that history has been written on the discipline, I've been led to believe that Bill Viola and Andy Warhol were the ones on the forefront of that medium. However, we in the audience were able to view excerpts of some of the video work that the panel members and others collaboratively produced, and because of the strength of the concepts presented in the works, they were very powerful. I really enjoyed myself because they spoke about their strong work ethic, about the bond that they shared, and about how that upon realizing that the white art world at general wouldn't know how to write about what they were doing even if they knew of it, they had to document for themselves and write for themselves. THAT'S what I'm talkin' about. All in all, it was like a shot in the arm for me.

Sometimes, I feel discouraged because I have many ideas inside of me, and occasionally they form into something concrete, but for lack of money I can't execute them. I think that I may start working collaboratively in the near future. It's also irritating when I know how much time I've put into making quality photographs and making solid conceptual art that is nevertheless accessible, and then I see trust-fund art grads making huge careers out of crap art. There are soooooooooooooooo many galleries in LA now, and a good 40% of what is represented out there is really bad. That will probably never change, though.

Kind of on the same subject but not really: something that I've been thinking about is artists and drug use. Sometimes I hear people say something along the lines of "It was alcohol/pot/acid/mushrooms/LSD/opium/absinthe/whatever that gave the great artists through the ages their greatest inspirations."

WRONG! Either you have it in you or you don't. True artists don't have to go outside of themselves to be inspired, or to influence them to make the best art ever. In fact, it's the other way around. Many artists go outside of themselves because they're crazy. I'm serious. I'm crazy. That's why I don't date artists and musicians: there's gotta be one person in the pair with a firm grip on the concrete, and it ain't gonna be me, thank you very much. Most of the artists that I admire are constantly pushing themselves because they can see farther than most people, and they allow their imaginations to run wild. I guess the substance use comes in when imaginations get too wild - sometimes you need something to temper it.

I ate a special brownie once. That's it. I laughed so hard I was hysterical, and then I saw the face of Jesus in a tree. It wasn't a bad trip, but I'll never do it again. I felt that anything could fall into me, and if something had fallen into me, who knows what would have happened? I was with a super good friend at the time, but still... I slept super good, though. I feel that there's enough inside me to make great art without relying on "experiences" to "enhance" and "expand" my mind. Most of the dreams that I remember upon waking up are enough for me.


Gag Me!

OK, I promise that this has nothing to do with BDSM.

I don't know about you, but I've been hearing radio commercials advertising this new energy drink called GoGirl!, and I swear, they make me wish I didn't have ears. Don't click on that link unless you actually like being overwhelmed with a nauseatingly (I think I just made up a word) thorough spectrum of pink. Are you kidding me? PINK??? And the radio ads are made to sound like you're listening to a focus group, and the women are all like, "I love the pink can, it's for me!", and they're all, "Ooooh, it's so fruity, I like that! It's like grapefruit!". Sweet bald-headed Christ! In the 21st century! It's nice that they donate a portion of their profits toward fighting breast cancer, but COME ON!!!

Also, if you have Gmail, then you know that your inbox is surrounded with ads that are inspired by certain keywords in a given email. I got an email about modeling, and this made it's presence known on the right-hand side:


It's nice to know that there are people out there who will facilitate this sort of thing...

btw, after leaving Trader Joe's today, a seagull dropped me a present on my windsheild. Now I have to wash my car.

Voting in 2008

I've been meaning to post for a few days, but I haven't had the time. A lot has been going on politically, and unless you take an active interest in what's going on with the government, media, and the machinations of the current election season, you probably will get only half the drama.

For the record, ever since Dennis Kucinich was pointed out to me, I've been a huge fan - I'll be voting for him in the California primaries. When I told my parents that, they starting harping about how that's a wasted vote.

Ex-squeeze me?

This is a wasted vote: when I am ardently anti-war, anti-imperialist, anti-colonialist, pro-choice, pro-affirmative action, anti-NAFTA, anti-IMF, pro-nationalized medicine, pro-labor, and then I vote for someone who talks about bombing Iran, making concessions to "pro-life" wackos, mandating that every American buys insurance or face tax liens and garnished wages, will never have the balls to abolish NAFTA and withdraw from the WTO and change the rules of the IMF, won't liberate Puerto Rico, and uses economic sanctions to punish nations who don't get in line with our will.

When I vote for Kucinich in the primaries, I will be casting a valid, un-wasted vote for a serious candidate who has a past of following through on his word, and is the ONLY progressive candidate. I fully realize that he will not ultimately win the Democratic primaries, and therefore I will not be voting for president in the elections come November. My vote is too precious to be given away to people that I find reprehensible, irresponsible, and just more of the same.

Just in case anyone's reading this, I want to make a point - the only reason why Kucinich, other "second-tier" candidates, and third-party candidates don't have a chance is because Democrats and Republicans are too invested in the two-party system, and the media - even though they have no right to - decides for us early on who will be a "serious" candidate. Take the case of NBC. According to the rules that NBC had set up (which are inherently undemocratic), Kucinich surprisingly made the cut, and was originally invited to participate in the debates that were held earlier this week. They didn't want him to debate. So they changed their rules and disinvited him. He sued them in court, and won - the judge said that they have to let him debate. NBC then appealed, and won, and got their way - even though Kucinich is still in the race for the Democratic nomination, they didn't want him on.

Why? There are many theories, but personally I think that they - and the corporate media at large - do not want to upset the little applecart that they have set up to where only the candidates that they want the public to see will be seen. You can click here to see Kucinich's interview with Amy Goodman on Democracy Now. He responds to the questions that were asked of Obama, Edwards, and Clinton. What we've got to realize is this: the corporate media are not disinterested viewers, merely reporting what they see. They haven't been that for a long time. This is why I'm glad I don't have a TV - I'm sure I'm not missing anything.

One thing that bothers me about Kucinich, though, is that he is still affiliated with a party that likes to treat him like crap. They do nothing for him! I have a plan, I just don't know how to implement it: get him and all the people who call themselves Progressive Democrats to join the Labor Party. Get every union to get its members joined up with this party. If the party got bigger and more people knew of it, I think that the 40% of Americans who don't vote would, and would vote for Labor Party candidates.

We don't live in a democracy. The electoral college ensures that the will of the people will not prevail in a presidential election, and the two-party system is working too well for the moneyed and propertied. If this were a democratic society, senators and representatives would not overwhelmingly be lawyers, CEO's, and other such criminals. There would be more artists, teachers, small businessmen, and other such working-class people representing us. Most people are poor, whether they be working class or "middle-class" (although the middle class dwindled away to nothingness quite some time ago).

This is my political rant for the day. If you already know me, you are not surprised. If not, then let me introduce myself: I would call myself a socialist, but I'm wary of being associated with groups, be they social, political, whatever. You will never convince me that capitalism has done beautiful things for the world, and that I'm too idealistic and therefore unrealistic. You're wrong and I'm right. Boo.



I wasn't even going to post today.

I googled my name to see if my blog would show up in the search, and one of the results included Mistress Alexia, a London dominatrix. Wonderful! I am so pleased, don't ask why! This takes me back to an adventure I had with a couple friends not long after graduating from college. Let me tell you...

I'm on Facebook (of course!), and one of the groups that I eventually joined is BDSM-Fetish. The concept of BDSM had always intrigued me for reasons that I never really understood. I don't have enough balls to order someone else around, and neither am I into being flogged or suspended by rope. Am I? I don't think so. Anyways, the group moderator would post different bondage-related events that happen in LA and thereabouts, and naturally I decided to see for myself what goes on in these clubs.

Upon doing a little background research to make sure that no one would immediately seize me upon entrance in this club and then clamp electrified pliers on my nipples (I know, I'm such a nerd), I got a couple of my friends to go with me and check out DV8 night at Passive Arts. We were scared. To say the least. S&M is something I had only ignorantly joked about with my friends or to scare my mother (more on her later this week). The dungeon's location isn't necessarily out-of-the-way, but we did drive past it a couple times. We parked, nervously giggled all the way to the front door of the place, paid our cover, and walked in.

Oh, joy - you know, I like God. He's so funny! Not that our experience was hilarious, it's just that I was unmanned by how relaxed I felt. Yes, there was a creepy guy binding a scantily clad girl in miles of intricately knotted rope, suspending her from the ceiling, and spinning her while alternately slapping her @$$ and tickling her with a feather. Yes, in a separate small room, a dominatrix who startlingly looked like Loretta Devine was spanking a naked white dude who was slung over a chair with a riding crop. But there was something about the atmosphere that made me feel safe (can't speak for my homegirls, though). I think it had something to do with the fact that it's such a community. I don't know. I do know that I felt more apprehensive at the nightclubs I used to frequent - that it felt more like a meat-market there than at the dungeon.

One friend got into this little cage, and I suspended it and spun her around in it. That's about as kinky as it got for me.

We left when this one guy was preparing to suspend himself from the ceiling using his flesh-hook piercings. I can sit and watch a foreboding looking man run the tips of sharp knives and daggers all over a half-naked girl's body, but I do have my limits.

It was an educational night, and I went again, the second time with an ex-boyfriend of mine. We're still friends. He thought that everyone there eventually gets their fill of bondage and humiliation and then erupts into a spontaneous orgy, at which point he could jump in. No such luck, my nig.

I'm still fascinated, but I haven't been there in over a year. At least there's a mistress out there in the dark alleys of London, whipping and humiliating powerful Anglo businessmen into submission, all in the name of Alexia. Right on.


In Which Several Men Wear White Wigs...

The gathering Friday was great! The walls were covered with foil, and there wasn't much of a choice at the open bar (haaaaayy!), but I got a lot of pictures of the scene at World of Wonder.

It was really crowded - there's probably no artist that has attracted so many people both during his life and after his death than Andy Warhol. The title of the event was "Andy Warhol: Dead at 21". Much of the artwork on display was inspired by Warhol's persona, artwork and films, and featured appropriations of his ideas. Pretty interesting night. Mary Woronov - a Factory actress, B/underground movie phenomenon, and writer - read from her new book about her days with Warhol. I first met her when I joined the staff of Artillery Magazine (see links list), and not only is she super nice, she's a very good writer.

After we left, we walked up and down Hollywood looking for a bar, me snapping pictures along the way, dipping into the occasional sex shop (yes Mommy, I'm sorry, but I've been in a few sex shops). And only 20 minutes after shooting a pic of one of Angelyne's billboards did we see her turning a corner in her pink Corvette! Christ, I love America.

*ADDENDUM* Click here to see pics from that night...

Soon our feet began to cry out in agony, so we went to The Abbey. And let me just say, I think I know why I love the gay bars in West Hollywood - I can be ME and it's safe too! Dreamgirls was playing on the flatscreens. Much better than the anime/hermaphrodite/rape-porn that was up the last time I was there. We danced a little too, but mainly got cranky when people had the audacity to dance in front of the screen while the movie was playing.

So, that was my weekend. Except I was accidentally in a movie yesterday.

Okay, the story is this: I was driving through downtown to a job site - catering for a Vogue event - when I got to a place where everyone in LA it seems had to detour because the street was closed for film shooting. It was taking way too long, so I decided to park at a meter and walk before I was too late. All the extras were milling around, and nobody stopped me, so I was just walking down the sidewalk trying to get through to the other side when I heard "ACTION!"

My eyes widened as the extras started their sidewalk foot-traffic action, so I kept walking as if I were in the production also. Good thing I blended in.

Two actors were running across the street - probably away from a bad guy - while a prop charter bus looked like it was about to run them down.

When I reached the other end of the set, I heard "CUT!", and just barely registered the fact that I had whisked right past Ryan Gosling, who was on his cell phone. He was excellent in Half Nelson, by the way.

I don't think this film will be set in Los Angeles, because you never see that much pedestrian traffic here.

Okay, that was my weekend, I promise.

If you get a chance, grab a copy of the current Artillery issue - I just finished it this morning and I really enjoyed it.


Alright, I'm doin' it...

I was talking to my homegirl Peggy today to let her know that a favor that she did me paid off - it looks like a couple times a month, I'll be a background dancer on the show Descontrol, seen on Telemundo (I was a contestant on 12 Corazones last summer!). She started to congratulate me, and then told me about how she wanted to shake me because I should be writing about all the stuff that I've done.

I must admit that ever since moving to LA, my life has become one big anecdote. I get into these weird adventures and do crazy (yet legal and un-sleazy) things for money. She's right! And later tonight, I'm gonna let her shake me good ;-).

It's never crossed my mind to begin my own blog - I'm a bigger fan of reading than writing. Although I'm not nearly as shy as I used to be, I'm still introverted and private. I think that this blog will focus on my adventures, my art work, and thoughts about politics, art, and local culture. I'll try to post at least 4 times a week, and as time goes on I'll add more stuff to the site.

So tonight, I'm going to World of Wonder and Miss Kitty's, and hopefully by Sunday I'll let you - the WORLD - know about how that went. If you care. It's okay if you don't...
PS - that's me & Peg, the night I first ever got drunk. I was 23.